As I read the daily devotion today by Anne Graham Lotz, experience the same thing. At times I just feel dry, or that God is being silent...and sometimes He is, but this is not that. This is a feeling that He is calling to me, but I just can't reach Him. I read the Word, I pray, but all falls flat. As I read her devotion, they are always short, but packed with wonderful inisghts, I realized those times are when I haven't confessed my sin and asked for forgiveness.
I think as a woman who's been a Christian most of my life, there probably isn't a lot of blatant outside sin and I am lulled into a kind of apathy about it. But I know, more importantly, He knows, my thought life and my heart life, both can be chock-full of sinfulness. When I ask Him to examine my heart, my motives, there are always issues to be looked at. And leaving those "undone" for too long hinders my relationship with a God that is holy and cannot abide any kind of sin. Hebrews 4:12 says, "For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged
sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and
marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." So I read the Word, but miss, or worse, ignore its promptings to repent.
I'm serious, it doesn't take longer than about 2 seconds to think of a thought or idea I had that was not pleasing to Him and not consistent with my walk. By the above verse, I can rest in knowing He will always let me know when there is something in me that He wants to change. Old ways of thinking and feeling, wrong ways, He wants to make right, in accordance with His Word, with who He is, and He is love. (I John 4:8.)
Far from being an angry father, ready to punish and withhold His love, He stands ready to forgive, arms open wide, ready to embrace and I can be awash in all this love and mercy, and beyond, all I have to do is ask. Let me remember to do so a lot more often.