Wednesday, May 21, 2014


Hmmm....what to tackle today, the lost innocence of children, even on television, or near and dear to my heart.  I think the latter.

I started to notice it when first married to my first husband, that sentence laden with baggage, but when I would meet people they inevitably asked what "I did."  And when I answered "housewife", was usually met with condescending attitudes, or at the worst, pitiable ones.

Let me first say that I believe women should have the choice to be whatever they want to be, so long as their family doesn't suffer for their choices.  There are plenty of men, young men especially, ready and willing to support their wives in their endeavors and that means doing their part in the running of the household.  That's terrific, I know many. 

But there should equally, be no shame in opting for the role of homemaker.  My heart goes out to those single moms who absolutely cannot have that choice, though they yearn for that life with their kids.

When did being the heart of a home become so de-valued?  Earning power became more essential than a prepared meal shared together?  I know there are real needs that cannot be met unless both people work.  However, the people I used to speak with would claim this, but maintained far more square footage than needed and drove bigger and more expensive cars than they needed as well.  Why is it not okay to sacrifice things for relationship? 

I was my kids' mom and wouldn't have had it any other way.  I did work outside the home, very briefly when my kids were little, and their lives became disastrous.  I made the decision when a horrible incident happened with one of them, this will not happen again.  And to be sure, I must stay home with them.  I won't go into all that now.

My point is that I am happiest now, once again, to be an at-home woman.  My joy is folding and ironing clothes so my husband has what he needs to wear to work and look nice.  I am thrilled to stand at the kitchen sink and wash the dishes that don't go in the dishwasher, and look out the window at the little birds in the blackberry bush flitter here and there.  To clean the muddy paw prints off the floor after taking the dogs out for a romp, leaving them happy and tired.  Making a home clean and calm is nurturing to the family and being lost in many homes.  It is true, clutter makes our minds feel cluttered, there is no real rest in many homes. 

I feel what I do is important.  Dave works hard all week, I want him to come home to a peaceful environment and that doesn't happen on its own.  That said, it is the things that don't show that are of truest value.  To have time to sit and talk with your children or grandchildren, to be there to offer cookies and milk when they come home from a bad day at school, to read a book together and discover new worlds, etc., these are the deepest joys of being at home. 

Those years have come and gone for me now.  My grandchildren are coming this summer and I can't wait to have those moments.  But I can look back at my time with my precious, precious kids and be so glad, and so thankful, though it meant tremendous economic hardship for us, that I was there for them.  They have both told me how they looked forward to coming home and now that old age crouches at the door, that is a blessing that sustains.

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